All the Christmas Feels

    

 I was reminded today why I love this time of year so very much.  Of course, the most important thing is our focus on our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, the promised Messiah, our Emmanuel.   Secondly, it's the time we purpose to spend with family.  Trust you me, that gets harder each year as our family grows with marriages, girlfriends and boyfriends, and the wonderful grands as we try to round everybody up the same day, phew! We love family so very much, so eventually we will figure it out and share Christmas joy.  But the very next thing I love so much this time of year is unpacking and gazing on all the memories.

I walked around the house today after decorating last night and it just put a huge smile on my face and in my heart.  I love to reminisce over all the amazing years I've been blessed with celebrating this time of year.  I love unpacking the Christmas boxes and finding the first Advent creation Rusty & I did with all the felt pieces that he cut out and that I glued together from a Focus on the Family Christmas celebration book we used.  I love unpacking the pictures the children painted over the years, or my first Santa & other stuffed animals we collected for the children, putting together the manger scene that was passed down to me from my mom as we reflect on every character, wrapping the tree in the Christmas skirt Aunt Fran made with love, placing the wood painting my sister Sandi created and gave me in the bathroom, seeing all the ornaments from family & friends that hold special meanings (like the family stockings ornament Becky & Brian gave me with all the children's names on them), hanging all the handmade ornaments from when the children were young and so much more.  I love it all.   

 I love the pageantry of the season at various churches in our area from the Singing Christmas Tree, to the Augusta Youth Chorale Christmas program, to the drive thru nativity scenes, candlelight services, and the way our church (Kiokee) celebrates throughout the Advent season with Scripture, songs, and so much more.  It does my heart good to see how the church comes together this time of year to celebrate the season with family & friends whether it's watching someone else's children in a Christmas play, enjoying the Nutcracker ballet on stage, walking Lady A park lit up for the holiday with ice skating and hot chocolate nearby, or any of the other holiday festivities.

I love the cookie swaps, the gathering of my children's friends for parties, the wrapping of gifts, Christmas with their classmates to end the semester, and when we can participate in Christmas caroling (this year it will be in American Sign Language).  

 I love the smell of a fresh Christmas tree.  I broke the kiddos hearts by not being able to go to our sweet family in North Carolina this year because our schedules didn't jive to pick our tree.  We went to our local Lowe's and found a beauty.  However, we still stuck to our traditional Christmas tree decorating dinner and snacks of appetizers (meatballs, pizza, summer sausage & cheese) with the specific cookies (chocolate peanut butter off brand from Wal Mart like Girl Scout cookies & the Keebler Elfwiches), and eggnog.  We had either Christmas movies or music in the background and shared many a laugh.  

I don't listen to Christmas music before Thanksgiving, but from that day forward I cannot get enough of it.  There are so many beautiful old hymns, new arrangements, and new songs that my Spotify list is ridiculously long and I enjoy every second of it.   

I could be sad for all the family we are missing this season especially my Rusty, but I'm choosing joy in remembering all those happy Christmas' we had together.   That doesn't mean I may not shed a tear here or there wishing he could see those grandbabies in their Christmas attire, see the joy on their little faces, laugh with his children while opening Christmas gifts.  How he loved our grits casserole that we will be sharing in a few weeks on Christmas morn.  I love remembering how he was the biggest Santa of all wanting to surprise us with secret hidden gifts from extra work he would do to make it special for us all.  It brings me joy to remember those times and I truly feel so incredibly blessed to have enjoyed all those years together.  

 We never can do all the things perfectly as I imagine it should go.   We caught up on our Jesse tree readings tonight before the kiddos at home went to bed.   We will stay on track I'm sure for a few days, get behind again, and catch up again.    I'm working late with papers on the table, the dishwasher & washing machine running, and plenty of clutter I need to get put away that may not get touched until the weekend.  It's continually perfectly imperfect at our house.   I will never arrive or attain to having it all together.  But I've got Christmas music going, joy in my heart, and reminders of love all around my house in various forms of decoration and a few sleeping away in their beds.  Goodnight, friends & family.   I hope your heart is filled with all the Christmas feels this holiday season & you can rejoice in Jesus all your days.